According to BrillOnline: "Do ut des refers to an ancient Latin formula used when sacrifices were made to the gods in the hope of fruitfulness and security."
If you're interested, you can read up on it in more detail here: https://www.romansinfocus.com/sites/www ... %20des.pdf
It was, in essence, the Golden Rule said in many ways. One of the most commonly used forms of the Golden Rule is "Do unto others as you would want them to do unto you." Ultimately, it feeds on the human condition by stirring up a selfish idea: What do I want? If I give ____, will I get _____?
Even in the lowest of folk magic, we perform an exchange of some sort. We provide energy and/or offerings in thanks for an action we assume will be carried out in the immediate or near future.
All day long, no matter how humble people may try to act, they are always motivated by their own gain. What's in it for me?
These are the strings that salesman, advertising, and marketing pull at every single day. If they're talking to you, about you, you're listening! If they're not giving you something, they're a waste of your time!
It's also the reason why a lot of people get involved in magic and spirituality if they weren't raised with it. They want money, sex, revenge, etc.
Even sermons at a church tell you how you'll go to heaven if you do XYZ. Why did you dress up and go there? To get a reward at the end of your life. Maybe, if you're lucky, you'll get rewarded during your life! Oh, and please, donate money to the basket to be blessed extra!
So my question is, what do you think about Do ut des?
Why do you practice? Why do you pray? Why are you kind to others? Does Du ut des rule all your decisions?
For me, I was raised in a spiritual family. One grandmother was old world Slavic, the other was a southern bell Tsulagi (better known as Cherokee) from Alabama.
Spirits were a normal thing. When the door opened by itself, you told them they weren't invited. And if you swore in front of Baba's icons, you were going to be chased out of her house with a wooden spoon or broom.
Despite being exposed to many religions, I never took to any of them, and hated praying...still do. But what I was always raised to do was thank, not ask. I was taught to focus on what I had, not what I didn't have. As a child, I didn't know who or what I was thanking, so it was more of a "Hey, whoever you are, if you did that, thanks!"
And I'm grateful for that habit because current psychological research supports that people who are grateful are overall happier.
When I work through the feminine divine, I don't do it because I want a nicer house or promotion. I do it because it's my passion. But I'm always grateful for the blessings in my life.
However, I'm currently exploring a different avenue of the feminine divine, and although I feel called to it, it's confusing me. I feel like She wants me to ask for things. But the older I get (I'm turning 38 this April), the more I enjoy riding the natural flow of life, even if that means living with less. If I want something, I do it myself.
So we are stuck at an impasse as I wait for Her to nudge me, and She waits for me to express my desires.
I get it, I need to loosen my grip on the idea that, "If you want something done right, you do it yourself." Like most people, I like the security of feeling in control of my own life, even if it's a false sense of security, damnit...
So that's why I thought, why not get a few opinions and pick your brain? Maybe you can shine some light on something I'm missing.